Thanks for stopping by. Right now you may be asking yourself if I am the real deal. If I have felt your pain, your guilt, your anxiety, or your fear. Right about now you are wondering if I know what I am talking about. Right now you are wondering if I am just peddling another quick-fix. What I can tell you is that I spent decades right where you are. Worrying. Doubting. Making excuses. Procrastinating. Wondering if I looked stupid or if someone else approved of me and my choices.
The truth is I spent more years than I am proud of allowing my fears and insecurities to define my choices. And it always, inevitably, held me back from reaching my full potential. Those same fears, stories I had told myself from a very young age, were not only guiding my life but more importantly defining who I was to the world around me. Even though no one was aware of my insecurities because I had mastered the ability to hide them and appear like I was in charge of my life. I had mastered the ability to hide my pain and fears. Even from myself.
Can you imagine anything worse than living a life that leaves you feeling empty, lost, alone, sad, disappointed, fearful, and resentful? Can you imagine a life where you look like you have it all together on the surface, but deep down inside you feel the eyes of judgment upon you at every turn? Can you imagine a life where every choice you make gets ran through the mill of, "What would he/she think?" I couldn’t either. And yet, I lived that life for decades.
The truth was I was resentful of anyone with self-confidence and self-esteem. I was resentful of anyone who didn’t always worry about what other people thought. I couldn't make a decision and not second-guess it a million times. I struggled to stand up for my principles and convictions and not be riddled with guilt or the hidden fear of judgment. I was resentful of anyone successful because it made me face the fact that I had yet to chase my goals with any kind of real defined intention.
I had spent a lifetime being afraid of being rejected, and I didn’t even know it. I was cripplingly fearful of not being liked. Of being a bad mom. Of being a bad wife. Of being a disappointment to my parents. FEAR had been in charge of nearly every decision in my life from a very young age.
I had built a life that, on the surface, made me look brave. Like I was strong, confident, and capable. But in reality, I had built a life that was not really mine.
So if you’ve ever found yourself feeling like you don’t know who you are, I have been there. And I can tell you exactly why you hurt. Exactly why you struggle. Exactly why you cry. And even better than that, I can tell you exactly how to end that suffering.
As a Master NLP Practitioner and Life Strategist, I have since learned not only why I struggled and suffered to feel like I was ENOUGH, I have learned and mastered the tools to help you do the same. There is no reason for you to keep pretending your life is exactly as you wish it to be. You can build that life. A life that excites you. A life that inspires you. A life you are proud of.
If you have ever stopped yourself from saying or doing something because of how someone else might react, you need boundaries. I know because I did. I would hesitate or second guess myself if I had an idea because I wasn’t quite sure how so-n-so would feel about my “idea”.
Here is a quote from my new book Are You My Boundary, "Ever feel the need to speak up for yourself or someone else but the thought of an ugly confrontation was just too stressful and not worth the drama that would surely ensue? I bet you’ve had your fair share of situations where you really wanted to set Grandpa straight but then the thought of a lecture from Grandma and the evil eyes from everyone else in the room just didn’t seem worth the trouble. So instead you just rolled your eyes and walked away grumbling to yourself the exact words you wish you had the courage to say out loud.
"Ever feel like someone in your life doesn’t care about your feelings or your needs even though you always make the effort to care about theirs? Ever picked out that perfect gift for someone’s birthday even though you know they won’t remember your birthday or will give you something that you appreciate but was clearly not thought through? Ever feel like you make plans or set goals but your inability to assert yourself prevents you from seeing them through?
I bet you’ve made more than your fair share of excuses, just like I did. I called it “keeping my options open. Being flexible.”
Yeah right. I was afraid. Afraid to boldly hold my ground. Afraid to speak my mind. Afraid of judgment. Afraid of upsetting someone. Afraid I was wrong. Afraid. Afraid. Afraid. Unless it was a stranger, then lookout. I might bite their head off.
Sadly I had no clue that I was afraid. I thought I was being considerate. That I was being patient, tolerant, accepting, or nice. NOPE. I was being a coward. I was afraid to own my own choices."
So you can see that even though I had a good marriage, a great kid, even though I was building an amazing business, every relationship I had, both personal and professional lacked boundaries. Now, today, every relationship I have fits in MY LIFE rather than me trying to fit into theirs. And I can help you do the same.
After decades of research and study, I have built a system that I am proud to say helps people heal and grow into who they want to be, rather than just tolerating the life they have. I hope you will join me on this journey because it is more than worth the effort.
It’s possible to have a life that is rewarding, fulfilling, and exciting, all while being guilt, and stress-free. How do I know? Because I’ve done it, and I'm on a mission to help others, specifically women, design, build and live their dream lives and reach their full potential. Maybe even find true happiness along the way.
I know, that might sound like a load of B.S. that you have heard countless times. But I assure you, I walk the walk. No B.S. allowed here. Your struggles are real, so the solutions and tools you need, that I offer, must also be real, applicable, and most importantly, effective. And I can assure you, they are.
Like you, I've struggled with self-doubt and insecurity. Just like you, I wear multiple hats. I'm a mom, wife, daughter, sister, boss, colleague, friend. Like you, I've struggled to find a "Happy medium" where I didn't feel lost in the crowd. Where I've felt valued, needed, appreciated, and heard. Where I valued myself enough to make myself, and my dreams a priority. All while being a good wife, mom, daughter, etc. I understand that it's a balancing act. along the way, I've learned how to meet the needs of others WHILE meeting my own needs. Rather than making excuses for allowing myself to always come last. Rather than tolerating how people treated me because I felt unworthy of more, let alone worthy of asking for more.
Because I have a unique perspective, and decades of training and education, I am in a position where I feel the need to share what I have learned with you. So you too can live a life you love. And have relationships that fill your cup, rather than drain it.
I’m a food-loving home chef (or at least I make an effort to practice as often as possible to blow up my kitchen with new ideas and recipes). I live for a good slice of pizza and every day magical moments like the unexpected hug from my grown son or spontaneous proclamation of love from my husband. I love to travel and I'm a total sucker for silly jokes, action flicks, and cocoa around a campfire, as long as I don't have to sleep on the ground or fight the mosquitos.
As much as I love helping people heal their relationships, and ultimately themselves, I look forward to rainy days where we can snuggle up and watch a good movie and lose ourselves in the story.
As for my story, my family, my friends, my team, the people in my life ARE my life. They've helped me grow and expand into who I am and continue to do so every single day. And I am grateful to God for having them in my life. They help me be the best version of myself. So, yes, I am an entrepreneur who runs two successful businesses, who has a team of loyal people whom I care so much about. Yes, I juggle a very busy life. But I always make time for me, my needs, my feelings, my values. Because at the end of the day when I am refueled, when I take the time to fill my cup, to be intentional, I can be the best version of me for them.
As an entrepreneur, speaker, and life strategist as well as a business coach I love to share my hard-earned wisdom with women, and the occasional man, who is ready to dream their wildest dreams and are committed to making themselves a priority so they can achieve those dreams.
How Do I Do It?
That’s what I want to teach you. Whether you’re working in the same business channel as I do, an entrepreneur with your own kind of hustle, a professional woman who’s trying to fit more in your day without going crazy, or a stay-at-home mom who wants to build her dream alongside raising well-adjusted humans, I can help you figure out what you want and then how to make it happen.
I want to teach you how to establish your Priorities and set your Goals. How to say No more often so you can say Yes to what you really want. How to set and keep boundaries, and how to show up as the real you in all parts of your life. And I want to help you adopt habits that will help you in all parts of your life and a growth mindset so you #FFear. I’m a no-BS kind of girl who will always give it to you straight and encourage you to stop BS'ing yourself. I share challenges I’ve faced, mistakes I’ve made, and what I’ve learned along the way so you can learn too.
I will help you dig deep, increase your confidence, and take more risks. It won’t always be comfortable, but if you’re really paying attention, I just might get you believing that anything is possible for your life.
Let me be clear that I don’t know everything, and like you, I’m a work in progress. I’m still learning and growing and evolving as a wife, parent, entrepreneur, friend, and human. I hope all that I share will help you to learn, grow, and evolve and one day be able to say you Have It All. Because we all deserve that, don’t you think?
P.S. If my story connects with you and you want to explore how working with me could help you get closer to the life you really want, click here.
Let's back up a little...
I served in the military as a Chinese linguist. I also lived abroad in Germany for 2 years. I am bilingual (although my Spanish is a bit rusty and I cheat using Google translate more than I care to admit lately). I majored in business and psychology in college and used those skills to build an incredible small business with a team from across the globe. Those relationships are invaluable not only to me personally, but they have made me a better boss, a better person, and a better coach.
Because of my diverse and comprehensive background, I feel like it sets me apart and provides a solid understanding of all that I do. I am a natural-born leader, or as my siblings call it, bossy. My natural ability to make things happen, to maximize resources, to make people laugh, and to inspire people is what makes me different. My honest, unique, and individual approach solves problems and helps people come to a new level understanding of themselves and of what IS possible in their lives. I have the proven skill and talent to influence and guide and to make real breakthroughs and create lasting change.